William Wordsworth & Garth Brooks

Tim and his cousin Jordan, July 2003

Someone I love very much once asked me the following question: "If you had the chance to do it again, to have Tim again, knowing you would only have him that short time, and how he would die, would you?" (It's been a long time, those perhaps were not the exact words, but you get the idea). I didn't hesitate, I said, "of course!". I was not offended by the question, or put off by it in the least, but the answer was a no-brainer. Still is. Yes, we only had Tim for 15 1/2 years, but we had Tim for 15 1/2 years! I would not trade that time for anything. His death hurt so much precisely because we loved him so much, and it would be worse not to have that love, that boy. William Wordsworth, in a favorite quote of my husband's, said;

 "I loved the Boy with the utmost love of which my soul is capable, and he is taken from me—yet in the agony of my spirit in surrendering such a treasure I feel a thousand times richer than if I had never possessed it.."

We could not say it any better than that.  And that reminds me of a Garth Brooks song, "The Dance" (written by Tony Arata)

"And now I'm glad I didn't know
The way it all would end the way it all would go
Our lives are better left to chance

 I could have missed the pain
But I'd of had to miss the dance"

As I write this, I am thinking of dear friends of ours. Their oldest son has Duchenne's MD. It is very rare for children with this disease to make it to 30 years of age. They know that every day they have is a gift. 

Peace